Musings on Here and Meta-here

I thought I’d take a five minute break from my cleaning and packing to jump in to Five Minute Friday.  I’ve missed it. Full disclosure:  The parts written in parentheses came after the five minutes was up.  😉  

Moving is always bittersweet and this house, this here has been good to us.

I will miss our gorgeous view and the feeling of having lots of space.

I won’t miss the feeling of living on someone else’s property and the neighborhood kid drama on the playground.

We’ve watched our girls grow here, welcomed Lainey to our family in this house.  We survived Tomas here.  I remember when I moved in looking out at the ocean (that I never could believe I could actually see from my house) and thinking that beauty will sustain me in hard times and set me flying in good times. In only the four years that we’ve lived in this house we’ve seen so many of both.  What stories will play out in our next home?

My ‘meta-here’–not my physical space but the landscape and scope of the inside of my head and heart–feels messier than normal.  I have been near panic for most of the week trying to figure out HOW TO GET OUT OF THIS HOUSE given parameters that seem nearly insurmountable.  I have been, at times, as downtrodden and depressed in the wake of all of our wonderful news as I have been in some of our out and out ‘low’ journeys.  The time crunch, the feeling of having to do it ALL on my own.  It makes this temporary feel bigger than anything else.  Overwhelmed is not a feeling I wear well.

But this is what I know:  I am held in this meta-here too.  I am helped here.  I am provided for here.  I am loved here.  I am accepted as I am here.  The voices that scream that my feelings are much ado about nothing are skirting the truth.  The voices that scream that this is impossible and that I am not up to this task are lies from the enemy.

Here I am held.  I am His.  And in His provision, little by little, piece by piece, even the most insurmountable looking mountain can be climbed.  Even the most daunting obstacles are overcome.

I am safe here.


7 thoughts on “Musings on Here and Meta-here

  1. This was so well put!! I can so relate to the meta-here, often a raging sea more that a trickling steam of living waters, ha!! But He is HERE and calms the storms often as soon as they rage. A prayer for you through this transition that it would widen your person grace glorified and the impossible will be a display of all that IS possible through HIm who strengthens us…glad I stopped by…thanks for stopping by and leaving a sweet note!!

  2. Catching up on your posts here, Val. This is beautiful, the being held in the midst of all you have going on. Praying for that abiding peace, and for many hands to come around and help in all the logistics!

  3. I’ve missed your musings and as usual you help me see a glimpse of you I love all the more. Just keep telling yourself “I am woman, hear me ROAR” You can do anything you set your mind to through Christ! Sending prayers of strength and help! xoxo

  4. It’s the strangest thing, I don’t know you, I actually found your blog by searching “my husband made chief now what?” This might be one of the best search results ever though, you are so inspiring. This particular post touches me deeply, I just lived this exact experience in January. I love these words, ” I remember when I moved in looking out at the ocean (that I never could believe I could actually see from my house) and thinking that beauty will sustain me in hard times and set me flying in good times.” We left a home on the ocean where we survived my mother in law and endured many other losses and joys. It’s just so odd that your words feel like they came right out my own life.

    • Heidi, I’m so glad you commented! And… I SO totally hear you on, “My husband made chief now what?!” 😉 😉 I love when I find people whose words resonate with mine or vise verse. Come back and chat more! 🙂

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