Full Palette

Five Minute Friday.  I crawled off the couch long enough to do one.  Today’s prompt:  Color

I am sick with streaky-red infection.  The fever has subsided and the antibiotics seem to be doing their job of fading the pink strip a bit at a time.

When husband goes it feels like the world washes out a bit.  The colors aren’t as bright, but maybe what really happens is that I have to get out some of the colors I don’t like to color with.  I always favored the reds and purples and greens and yellows and tried to find the just right bright combination when I colored as a little girl.  I tucked the browns and greys and blacks off to the side.  Was it my tendency to want to hide from the things that feel dark and unknown even then?

The streaky red fades but leaves me tired enough that things feel grey and fuzzy and lonely enough that I get out the blue crayon and scribble it round the room.  I miss him.  All the denial of the weeks leading up to this…  Were those just moments of me tucking the crayons I didn’t like away?

We’re given a full palette of colors and they were all created by the One who loves us.  I shrink away from the uncertain ones–The anxious shocking whites and the grey-blues that you can get lost in, but he gave me those to color with too.  Teach me to embrace and be grateful for each crayon in my box.

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4 thoughts on “Full Palette

  1. And then there are those white crayons “what am I supposed to with this?!” I ask…I feel that season of life too 🙂 beautiful reflection. Stay strong. The purple and greens will return. Until then, we will sit together a spell…enjoying the complexity of the browns and grays.

  2. ‘be grateful for each crayon in my box.’ still learning the lesson ‘In everything give thanks”. Hope you feel all better soon.

  3. Love this one too. I feel the same way. “Ok, Lord, I’ll do this, but You know this won’t be worthwhile or beautiful if You don’t make it so?”–that’s how it goes with me. Thank you for the visual. I spend lots of time with crayons each day–great reminder 🙂

  4. Oh, sorry to hear you are sick…pray that you get well fast…even when you’re sick, you still write with color and style…like the metaphor you used…there probably isn’t a color that can capture the ache you feel for your husband 😦 ….is it okay if I send you a hug?

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