A Good Reason to Be Tired

Five Minute Friday again!  Yay!  I was a little too excited that this week’s prompt was ‘tired.’  I’ve got some things to say about ‘tired’ at this point!!!

I remember Rich Mullins saying the following:  “Everyone always says, ‘You look so tired – can we pray for you?’ I’m like, ‘Man, if I didn’t look tired, you should pray for me. I would’ve had to have made a deal with the devil to not look tired. I deserve to look this way.'”

I don’t know about you, but that particular comment resonates with me.  (I always loved Rich’s take on the world).   Man, I deserve to look this way.

Deployments are a time of perpetual tired.  It’s partly my own fault.  I stay up too late.  My  husband isn’t here to remind me to go to bed, and trudging upstairs to face that empty spot is so hard some nights, so I watch Netflix late into the night, or plink away on blogs or Facebook.  I’m tired!  And this is only the beginning.

But there’s also just the sheer attrition of it all.  The solo-parenting.  Being the only one ‘in charge.’ Not to mention the exhaustion that comes from just plain missing the man who I love all the time.  Am I tired?  Yep.

It’s so often seemed like one thing after another around here.  I think it’s that way for everyone really, but I think our family has hit some biggies.  Do I look tired?  Yeah.  I deserve to look tired.  We’ve been through a lot.

I think it’s a good thing though.  I’m tired because I’m LIVING.  My heart is entrenched in missing this man that I love…  We’ve survived some gruelling things in the eight years of our marriage.  Life has been hard and that makes me tired, but I’m tired because I have LIVED.  FULLY.

It’s a good reason to be tired, don’t you think?

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5 thoughts on “A Good Reason to Be Tired

  1. You have so many reasons to be tired! I love your observation that you’re tired because you’ve lived and are living fully. Reminds me of a Garth Brooks chorus that says “Life is not tried, it is merely survived if you’re standing outside the fire.” I hope you find some rest this weekend!

  2. Oh, most definitely a good thing to be tired! I remember when my second was born just 14 1/2 months after my first and I would tell my mom how tired I was, as if it was odd or somehow not quite right, and she would remind me, “Of course you’re tired – you have TWO little ones to care for!” It used to make me feel more tired to hear that, but I’m learning that it is a GOOD tired – a tired that means I am blessed beyond measure, that I am here, day in and day out, soaking up these moments with two precious little ones. I’m still tired, but I deserve to be tired – and I’m BLESSED to be tired. Thank you for sharing!

  3. Thank you so much for sharing this! Coming to the same realization with our own deployment. It’s so hard to give myself grace for the ways I’m drained these days, but a sweet friend reminded me last week that I am grieving and coping, whether I realize it or not, every minute of every day. As this is our first deployment I am so grateful to find it is not out of the ordinary. Thank you!

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