By The Numbers…

Edited to add:  Apparently I tucked the idea of ‘doing math’ away after reading Marine Wife’s post on her blog, Dragonfly.  I can’t believe that when I wrote it, I completely forgot and then I used the same title!  My apologies for inadvertantly borrowing your idea without crediting you!


Feeling pretty down today and really missing Husband on a beautiful spring day that is too glorious not to share with him.  So, masochist that I am, I decided to do a little math. 

This June 29 we will have been married five years.

Husband will have been gone a total of 24 months at around that time (actually that includes his last detachment in July, so two weeks shy of 24 months as of the actual date of our anniversary).

Two out of our five years together, we’ve spent apart.

August and Shore Duty can’t come quickly enough.


A quick P.S.  To add to my craziness…  A part of me feels guilty that we’ve had him home for three years (total).  I know we are extremely lucky in some respects to have had him home as much as we did.  That’s almost even more frustrating….  To have had him gone that much and to feel that I constantly have to buck up because he could have been gone more.


9 thoughts on “By The Numbers…

  1. Hang in there! At the risk of sounding cliche, it does get easier. I understand what it’s like, my husband is about to leave on deployment number 6 in 9 years of marriage. Just remember the good times, do something right now… right now, that makes you feel like the complete, strong, fantastic woman you are. Dosen’t matter what… You can do it! I will be praying for you. Amie

  2. **hugs**

    I know how you feel…I have those days as well. I hope the time flies by quickly for you! There is some light at the end of the tunnel! And you don’t need to feel guilty about him not being gone for longer…you all are doing enough for everybody else in this country.

    You inspired me to do a little math for myself. We will be married for 1 year this Cinco de Mayo(!) but we’ve been dating since 2003….so about 5 years, 5 months together and it’s exactly down the middle in terms of how much time we’ve been separated and been together! I don’t know what I would “prefer”: shorter more frequent tours or the long 15 month ones we have to deal with now!

    How do you deal with care packages? I know somebody who mailed their husband one a week during his 6 month tour in Afghanistan, but I have a hard time thinking of what to mail my hubby so it’s once a month for me! The boy is trying to keep fit so the usual junk food I like to spoil him with is out!

  3. Waste no time with guilt, especially as one recovering from PPD. I am sorry that you are missing your husband. It must be rough having him away so often. Thank you for the sacrifices you make for your country.

  4. I do that math sometimes too. And once I figure it all out, I feel the same way–intensely sad that all our time apart is quantified in YEARS, and yet I feel so amazingly lucky that he’s been home as much as he has.

    So either we’re both crazy, or we’re both entirely normal. I’ll let you pick which one.

  5. Never feel guilty about having him home.

    I used to do that math too. I think there should be a law or something against military wives doing that kind of math. It is a sure fire way to drive ourselves crazy.

  6. No math! Hopefully my daughter won’t read this post – I don’t need that one coming back.

    I wish I could reach through the screen and give you a great big hug – one wife missing her husband to another. Don’t feel guilty about having hubby @ home – he is your gift from God.

    Thank you for your sacrifice!

    Prayers are with you.

  7. No worries! Yeah, sometimes doing the math is a little like picking at a scab and not letting it heal. Try not to let it get to you. There will always be military families who have it worse and those who have it better in terms of time spent together. You can’t compare.

    Sarah over at SpouseBuzz compared deployments to snowflakes. You may have a long deployment that you manage to get through without too much trauma. But you may know someone who has a short deployment that turns out to be just god-awful. It’s apples and oranges! Just keep putting one foot in front of the other!

  8. (((((HUGS)))) It cannot be easy to have a husband who has to go away often. Not to mention, the possibility of him getting hurt on the job.

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